Fuck off!
The left & members of the LGBTQIA community are REALLY pissing me off regarding Pete Buttigieg & “gayness” lately. This stupidity must stop, and it must stop RIGHT FUCKING NOW.
If you want someone who can eloquently express what it means to have a gay candidate for president, feel free to read Scott Bixby. If you’re looking for an intelligent argument as to why the attacks on Buttigieg being “not gay enough” is stupid, best look to John Aravosis. Or read what the advocate wrote. You’re not going to find any of those things here. What you will find here is me PISSED the fuck off that there are people that are so desperate to winnow the field down to 1 candidate, that they’re willing to get down into the ugliness of identity politics. Nicknamed the Oppression Olympics, when you have an embarrassment of riches as far as this field goes but you REALLY want a certain candidate. Skip merit and go for the superficial. Oh, and while you’re at it, don’t talk up the identity of your own candidate. No, lets tear down the other candidates.
Over 20 years ago I was 16 years old. I was living with my family and I was a young republican in Ft. Madison Iowa. There was a meeting one day after school and someone came to speak to us about the importance of conservatism. I can’t remember what it every detail of it but after the speaker had a casual talk with some of us. One thing has always stuck with me. He said “liberals and conservatives were just two sides of the exact same coin. The difference is that conservatives we more honest about their intentions.” We moved from Iowa to Chicago not to long after that and that’s when I started dating an Egyptian guy named Amir. He was the first guy I was in love with. Not the guy I lost my virginity to. That was a few years earlier. Not the first guy I dated. This was head over heels in love. But there was no one to talk about it with. I was a teenager, and this was the late 90s’. So, I journaled everything. My mom and my sister are born again Christians. The mega church, speak in tongues, go to church 2–3 times a week type of evangelicals. Especially my mom who’s the answer to the question: what would happen if Tammy Faye Baker fucked the mom from the movie Carrie then somehow had a daughter. Furthermore, there was NO such thing as privacy. Those journals became written evidence of my “many sins against the lord our father.” Not to long after being dragged out of the closet, I moved out. I bounced around from couch to bed to floor with a blanket and a pillow. I moved from Chicago IL eventually winding up in NYC. I stayed where ever there was a roof until I ran out of roofs. I lived on the street for a while. Just to have clean clothes & a meal daily, I ran drugs & I escorted. In that time of being homeless, living in the drop-in center above the CBGB in the east village and occasionally eating at soup kitchens. I ran into a lot of LGBTQ youth around my age. Many even younger than myself at the time. The youngest I met was Jacob at 15. In that time, race didn’t matter. Everyone was some ethnicity, from some religious background, from some political persuasion. But we were all LGBTQ; unwanted and trying to survive. Al Franken once joked that it’s probably harder to be gay than black in America. Because you don’t have to tell your parents you’re black.
Fast forward about 20 years. We’re down to 28 states that we can be fired being LGBTQ. Just last year, we got the right to adopt in all 50 states although some states are trying to undo that. Don’t ask don’t tell ended in late 2011. You wouldn’t know that considering that Trump is trying to roll that back starting with Transgender soldiers. You do know that’s where he’s starting right? Marriage equality is a little over 3 years old. I have a god daughter that could barely ride a bike without training wheels and she’s around 3 times older than my right to marry another man. It’s now 2019 and NEVER in my wildest dreams did I think this would be the year I’d see a LGBTQ person run for president and be considered a viable candidate. In fact, I was pretty sure that if I ever lived long enough to see a gay president, that I’d be celebrating it with my great grandchildren. I remember when I first heard of Pete Buttigieg. It was after he came out in 2015. My 1’st thought was, “he’s cute!” (I’m not going to lie, I’m a bit shallow). But immediately after that I thought he was brave. Here’s someone with something to lose and he’s taking a chance to make a stand for something bigger than himself. It was a breathe of fresh air considering not long before that, gay politicians in my lifetime were people like Republican congressman Aaron Schock. Anti-gay & in the closet. I guess having the balls to say you prefer balls doesn’t play in Peoria. I wonder what happened to him? Prior to that there was there was Larry Craig. For god’s sake, Larry FUCKING Craig. Larry Craigslist came out of the closet or should I say the bathroom stall in the most laughable of scandals. Then there was Gov. Jim McGreevey. America’s 1’st openly gay Governor. If I just left it there, maybe I could have some pride. Unfortunately, the internet exists. He came out because he was having an affair with someone on his staff (Yeah go ahead. Make the damn joke) and on the same day he came out, he resigned. Prior to that there was Barney Frank who was outed because of his live-in call-boy. I’m not going to judge this. It was the 80’s back when I was 7 so I have no clue what it was like to be gay then outside of what I saw on MTV. But he went on to become one our best statesmen and an advocate. But it’s safe to say I’ve never seen a Harvey Milk in my lifetime. Let alone, a LGBTQ lawmaker that didn’t come out off the closet without a scandal. Then along comes this mayor of a city I hadn’t ever thought of.
Then he ran for DNC chair. I was interested not because he was running to lead the party but because after Trump “won” 2016, it was obvious something was wrong in America that couldn’t be solely blamed Russia. There had to be something to be taken advantage of in the 1’st place and no matter what, something had to be done. He seemed smart, In his first debates and in further interviews’ eloquent all of which is why I’m not surprised he’s gaining popularity. I know I’m going to get tweets telling me I’m not paying attention to all the other gay candidates out there. But this is the 1’st one that got my attention and then he made me forget that he’s not simply a gay elected official. He’s a damn good one statesman, regardless of his orientation. Although being gay is the icing on the cake because if you’re not following his husband on twitter, then I must ask why you are even on the internet?
So, this is a fight I’m ready for. Bring on Pat Buchanan Newt Gingrich who seems to like him, Pat Robertson, Rush Limbaugh and his cheap less talented clones. I’m ready for all those sons of bitches. I just wasn’t ready for the punches from our own side. Obama talked about liberals forming a circular firing squad and he’d be right considering that slate writer Christina Cauterucci wrote in Slate “Is Pete Buttigieg gay enough?” Now titled “In a Diverse Candidate Field, How Is Pete Buttigieg’s Sexuality Factoring into His Appeal?” because of the well-deserved shit storm that followed. This is nothing compared to what I’ve seen via twitter and facebook. I find it amazing how EASILY his minority status can be dismissed. I say amazing. I really mean terrifying. I don’t presume to know what Pete’s life was like prior to coming out of the closet or even what it is like after. But listening to so called liberals & “woke” (over caffeinated) democrats easily boil him down to a cis-gendered white male makes me SERIOSLY question those that not that long ago were more than happy to call themselves our champions and defenders. This is not made any better by saying his life path as a gay man is mitigated by the fact that he’s a cis gendered white man. If anything, this makes it worse because if his minority status can be taken away from him, I have NO reason to believe it can’t be taken away from me. This isn’t any different than when Obama wasn’t black enough. Something else that bugs me as someone of mixed ethnicity, another under represented community. Because on the one hand, that paper bag test made a come back. On the other hand, fuck off, when did it become a crime (again) to be more than one ethnicity? Much of this is has been followed by “It’s not the gays turn” as if to say the White House is more like a time share in the Catskills.
I get that this is a primary. I’ll quote Randi Rhodes as I always do. “Fall in love during the primaries. Fall in line during the general. 35 after.” But this is the kind of ugliness that republicans speak of. One where merit of ideas takes a backseat to the superficial. I’m not discounting what it would mean to have the first woman, Latino or Asian. But let’s not pretend being gay isn’t a first or that it isn’t as historic. Furthermore, a primary is no excuse to devolve into the most basic and tribalistic of creatures. We, the LGBTQIA community are a minority just as worthy of being represented as anyone else. We aren’t some pet of the democratic party that only comes out when the progressive side of the isle needs a group to trot out to show their virtue. If you disagree with this statement, please do your best keep your candidate out of our parades. This kind on in-fighting is self-defeating because if we did this to every candidate and kept going until they checked every box in the Oppressed Olympics, we’d have to skip the 2020 election until we found a middle-aged, transgender lesbian of color with a disability. Maybe it’s just me but the lesson I learned from the civil rights struggles is that groups of people SHOULDN’T be on a totem pole. If what you seek isn’t to dismantle that totem, but to instead turn it on its head and if need be rearrange it so your preferred group is at the top. Then you’re really not any better than those that created that totem in the 1’st place.
This leads us to those in the LGBTQIA community. I don’t expect you all to support Pete Buttigieg. We’re not a monolith that votes in unison. What I do expect is for you NOT to degrade our community by tearing down one of your own. In scrolling through twitter, I came across this pile of shit. Nothing pisses me off like any set of gays saying what another set of gays should be. I don’t like it when “straight” acting gays look down on “fems” or vice versa. We have enough enemy’s without setting ourselves back. One’s that really don’t care if you can “pass for straight” or how “fierce” you think you are. Either way, we’re all fucking faggots that need to scraped off the surface of the world. So NOW is the best time for you to knock off this juvenile bullshit. There is no “wrong” type of gay except for the one that’s in the closet and working to drag the rest of us in there with them. Before I step off this part of my diatribe, there’s no set amount of “wokeness” that’ll make this OK. As someone of color, fuck you. Don’t use me as your shield. Don’t damsel me to justify your piousness.
As for those amongst us that are having a fucking fit over Pete saying that boycotting Chick-Fil-A is virtue signaling, allow me to break a cold reality to you. Chick-Fil-A still FUCKING EXIST. How effective has this boycott been? Have employees quit? Suppliers ceased supplying them with chicken? Do they have less stores? Boycotting has done nothing. I’d go as far as saying it’s done jack-shit. This company continues to grow. It hasn’t gone away or changed its policies in any meaningful way. I get the liberal instinct to protest. But if it’s not working, why do it? Prior to the boycott, I had NEVER heard of Chick-fil-A. This then small chain of restaurants was unknown to me until it went on the LGBTQ shit list. A boycott of the Montgomery buses worked in the 60’s because the majority of riders were black & the politics of the day were vastly different than they are today. All that happened when we boycotted Chick-Fil-A is that many people on the right went “Oh, I can do something to own the libs AND eat chicken? Sign me up.” We literally would’ve been better off marching into their stores dressed as leather daddy’s’, drag kings/queens & butchy flannel lesbians until they either changed their ways or closed shop. At this point, doing otherwise IS virtue signaling. You don’t have to agree with that. But don’t act as if he said you should go in and have some chicken.
I’ll end this the same way I ended my 1’st Medium post. Spend more time talking up your preferred candidate. I rarely ever mention anyone that’s not Pete in my social media because as far as I’m concerned, to do otherwise regardless of what’s being said is giving free advertising. No one that’s undecided is going to make up their minds on any candidate based on how much mud you sling. In-fact, I’d bet good money that’s what turns most people off about politics. That every campaign season, the average person is bombarded with the far left and the far right screaming extremes at each other. Leaving someone that might be interested in politics to throw up their hands and say to hell with them both. Give them a reason to support who you support that’s not about who you’re against (besides Trump). Be for something that’s distinguishable on a policy level. Yes, be proud for the potential first (X) president. But say why that candidate be the best candidate besides being the first (X) candidate. Because whoever wins, someone loses, and we all need to come together when all is said and done. Make that an easier path now. We must be better than all this. Right??? Having trouble agreeing with me? To that, the title really says it all. I’d hate to think after all this ranting. Maybe that guy that talked to my young republican group in Iowa was right?
